As I steadily work my way through a box of chocolates I'm keen to take the opportunity to stop and consider my hopes for this new year. James is working in his makeshift office in the corner of our sitting room and I am not allowed to talk! So it's a perfect opportunity to write.
Christmas in our house has been a quiet- ish time. My parents have been away with my dad's work since September and we have really missed them, especially over Christmas. It was lovely to spend some time with my older brother and his family before Christmas and we had James' mum here for Christmas which was brilliant. But my younger brother, his wife and daughter live in America, and James brother and family spent Christmas overseas too so it has felt a bit strange this year. Less family time than I would have liked. So I suppose one of my hopes for 2013 is more time spent with our families. Difficult to manage when we are divided by miles and oceans but Skype and FaceTime are very helpful and need to be used more!
James has just taken down all the Christmas decorations. I shall especially miss our Angel light that has been hanging on the yew hedge outside our house. We first put the Angel up the Christmas we nearly spent in Great Ormond Street Hospital. We were heading back and forth to the hospital but we had an angel watching over our family. Symbolic, yes but pointing to something so real.
We have spent a lot of time at home over the last 2 weeks and I have been trying to tidy and organise some of our paperwork and also our eldest daughter's room. I hope to keep on top of things this year and be more organised! No small feat for me. James is the most organised person I know and I try but generally fail a lot. But, I will make more of an effort to get systems and processes in place that will keep me on track and impress my husband too! I just need to organise them!
Holidays with the children at home have their moments of stress, especially when it has rained constantly and they have found it difficult to get along with one another. But there have also been priceless moments. Like baking a cake with Florence after she had chosen a recipe, written it down and shopped with her dad to get the ingredients, baked it with me and then taken it to our friends house to share. It has also given the eldest two a chance to have sleepovers where they have made camps before falling asleep surrounded by toys. Millie has loved having the older two at home and keeps track of where everyone is. She will be most put-out on Tuesday when everyone is back to school and work.
So although I have found keeping the peace a struggle these last two weeks, I am also grateful for some time with my kids and a break from the running around. I hope that this year we will have good family time. More cakes baked together, cycle rides and wii game battles!
As I think about the coming months one of the things I find hard is deciding on how to invest my energy and time when there are so many good and worthwhile things I could be doing but not that much time. How do I work out which are the things that are right for me? Rather than things that are good to do. I am considering this at the moment as a couple of things that I wanted to commit to, clash. One of them I feel I should do because it will help a friend out but the other I had wanted to do because it would grow me and challenge me as I walk out my faith. Both are good to do, both will be fun, both would let someone down if I didn't go. So I have decided to do both! One week, one, the next week the other. I may look uncommitted but I think it's a good solution! This year I want to think about what I am doing and not be blown about in an attempt to please people. I want to be purposeful in how I spend the little amount of 'free' time that I have. Free time obviously means having a 2 year old with me too!
I want to worry less and pray more in 2013. Worry doesn't change a thing. But prayer really does. I have the awesome privilege of being godmother to 3 of my close friends children and one of my nieces. This year I want to commit to pray for them, purposefully, regularly. It fills me with excitement just contemplating that. But actually, with the business of family life, if I don't purpose to do something then days and weeks fly by and it wouldn't happen in the day to day. In the everyday I am going to need to make time for these important tasks. Maybe I'll ban myself from my iPhone, I really would save time if I didn't check my email and Facebook so much. Yes, that has got to make it into my plans for this year. Rationed iPhone use!!
I am sure that there are more things I can add but I wanted to finish by deciding that I want to live with hope this year. To hope for good things for my family and friends. To hope for the miracle not fear the worst. To have hope because I know that God is good and to let that hope really resonate in my heart this year.
